30 Years!

As of October 1 I have had a store open on the same block in Cambridge for 30 years.  That's 30 years of selling my handmade jewelry, 30 years of making custom wedding bands and engagement rings, 30 years of providing people the opportunity to note all of the special occasions in their lives.

So much has changed in that time period and yet so much is still the same.  When I opened (with a partner, under the name Spirer Somes Jewelers) in October 1982,  gold was selling for approximately $375/oz.
The Internet didn't exist yet and most small businesses didn't have any type of computer.  There were no cell phones.  There were no Starbucks on every corner. In 2004, the partnership broke up and I reopened under my own name. Today gold is selling for $1770/oz., all of my advertising is done on the Internet, computers are an absolute necessity, we use cell phones not just for talking, but texting, shopping, web surfing, reading, watching movies, and I'm sure someone must have proposed to someone else via the cell phone at some time. And then there is Starbucks.....

But in 1982 people did buy engagement rings, wedding bands, anniversary and birthday presents, just the same as they do today.  And I got just as much of a kick out of playing a role in so many important events for my customers as I do today.  Because, honestly, that's what has always brought me the greatest joy.  Yes it's nice that I can earn a living doing something creative, challenging and fun.  But that's not what really moves me.  What does move me is that I work every day of my life with individuals, who are going to purchase something that I actually designed and made, that they are going to wear and use every single day of their lives.  Not a day goes by that I won't, in some small way, be a part of such meaningful times of my customer's lives. How can you not love that feeling?

The woman who placed the very first custom order I ever took in is still a customer to this day.  And I have made her daughter's wedding bands.  I have always had dogs in my shop and customers still come in wanting to know where the (now long dead) dog is that they remember.  I have had customers who have come in and bought second and even third wedding bands from me (yes for different marriages) because they have liked what I do so much.  That's a kind of weird compliment, but hey, I'm located in Cambridge and anything goes here.

In those 30 years I have set in jewelry: human teeth, dog teeth, a piece of the Berlin wall, rocks from the top of Mt. Everest (I think the top is a little lower now on account of it), pieces of titanium removed after operations, tyrannosaurus rex teeth, beach rocks, shells, and just about every imaginable gem and mineral.  I can't say that I have ever been bored.   Every new challenge, whether in how business runs, or in the jewelry that I make, is always interesting to me.

I actually don't like dwelling on the past very much.  However, it is worth noting a large milestone in some fashion or another. So here I am writing a blog article (blogs???---the term didn't even exist 30 years ago) about this milestone for me. But I am truly looking forward to the next 25 years of helping my customers and continuing to be that small, meaningful, part of their lives.

Pictured above is a hand built, one of a kind, 18k gold wedding band.

Engagement Rings 1

Engagement rings. Oh my. What one other thing do you give to another person that is imbued with so much meaning and substance? All other purchases pale by comparison. Here you are saying I want to spend the rest of my life with just this one other individual. And you have to actually give them something that represents that, both to them and to you.

This is usually the time you start to figure out if you really know the person. You walk into the jewelry store and the jeweler (in my case) or the salesperson starts to ask you questions. PERSONAL questions. Does your intended like white or yellow metals? Do they want a diamond (how can you even know this if you haven't actually discussed what you're doing with them)? What colors do they wear. Do you know their ring size? Do they like simple things? More unusual items? How do you know they'll say yes? What's a guy (or gal) to do?

Unfortunately this confusion often leads to picking out something incredibly simple. Guys, in particular, tend to feel it's much safer to choose the simplest, most straightforward design that they've been told through advertising (and, because most of their friends aren't much more adept when they propose, what they see on their friends' girlfriends) is the right way to go. Hence the somewhat absurd popularity of what is commonly known as the "Tiffany setting". This straightforward design with a plain band and a four prong setting was originally popularized by Tiffany And Co. (although it is unlikely it was actually created by them as it is such a basic design) and a version of it is made, and sold, by just about every jewelry store in America---well except in Daniel R. Spirer Jewelers.

This is a fine way to go if you're pretty certain that is what your intended really wants. After all, the goal is to make them happy. However if the guys actually knew how many women I get in here on their 5th, 10th, 15th, or 20th anniversary who say to me: "I really wanted something more interesting, but I couldn't say anything to him at the time. He had just proposed to me!! NOW I want you to make me something I really like because we've been married long enough I can tell him what I really like."

It's also a fine way to go if you really understand your intended and their style and it fits into that. Unfortunately, most of the time, most guys pick out something they like (or think they like), as opposed to thinking about what their intended would like, and let's face it, most guys tend to be pretty conservative in what they themselves wear. There aren't many out there like me who actually wear clothes that aren't off the rack and that represent my own sense of style!

So what is a guy (or gal) to do??? Well one thing is to simply propose without a ring and say let's go ring shopping. Women today are not what they were 40 or 50 years ago and many of them want a real say in something they are going to wear every day for the rest of their lives. Another is to make sure that anytime you're passing by a jewelry store with your significant other, stop and look at the stuff. You can ask what a person actually likes without giving anything away. You can also always give them some jewelry for other occasions (oh you know, like birthdays, Christmas/Chanukkah, Valentine's Day or my personal favorite giving holiday July 4!) and you'll get a feel pretty quickly if they like what you're picking out. Actually looking at what they already wear is also a good starting point. If your intended tends to wear big, wide rings with a bunch of work on them, you can probably be pretty assured that a simple four prong setting isn't going to work.

My belief is that you shouldn't be restricted to what is "customary" unless the intended makes it quite clear to you that is what they want. People like to be different and express themselves in ways that are different from every other person out there. Additionally, our lifestyles today don't lend themselves as much to a ring where a big stone is sticking up all over the place. How many rock climbers want to have their engagement ring sticking up all over the place as they grab onto various sharp ledges? What is most important to remember is that it's okay to do the unexpected these days.

Pictured above is my idea of an interesting engagement ring. My next posting on engagement rings will be on stones for them.