Seriously: If you don't have any training or time working in the field you're not a jeweler.

18k gold custom ring with a customer's stones.

Okay, so I get it.  It's a really romantic idea to make up the ring you want to propose with yourself.  But the reality is that most people aren't jewelers.  Unfortunately many people now seem to think that doing what I do is really easy, and there isn't much experience necessary.  I'm waiting for the day when we start saying to our surgeons that we want to do the operations on our spouses or kids because it would be really neat if we took care of them ourselves.  All the surgeon would have to do is watch us do the work and help us out a little. 

So this is an email I got awhile ago from a young gentleman:

"I'm looking into making an engagement ring for my girlfriend, and found your website while searching for jewelers in the area. I don't have any DIY experience outside of woodworking and electrical work, so I've been hesitant to really dive in. However, I just talked to somebody who was in a similar position and managed to find a jeweler who was willing to work with him through the process. Is this something that you would be willing to do / have done before?"

Okay, so understand that he has no experience, but he knows someone who did this so it can't be too hard right?  This was my response:

While I appreciate the sentiment, I don’t believe in working with customers this way for a number of reasons. The first is that it’s taken me 40 years to learn what I know and to make jewelry as well as I do. People who think they can just pick up the tools and do what I do tend to be unrealistic.  My employees all come out of an extensive two year school program (North Bennett Street School) and it still takes me about two years to get them up to the level I require (not my level---just the level I need for them to be helping to produce my work).  Secondly I have insurance issues with having people I don’t know in my workshop area.  I routinely work with pieces and gems worth thousands of dollars or even tens of thousands of dollars and I can’t have people wandering in and out of my shop area. And the third and final reason is that I would have to charge you about $500/hour because that’s what an experienced master jeweler’s time is worth. (I could sit with you for an hour or I could make up a ring I could sell for about $5000 and believe me you would need way more than an hour.) 

All that being said I know that there are some jewelers (lower skill levels, less experienced, etc.) who do what you want and I’m sure with a little research on line you can find some.  I have to warn you though that I get in people who’ve tried to make their own stuff and need someone with more experience than their teacher even to fix it.  Good luck with your quest!  

He thanked me and said he would be looking for someone who would do it. 

This is the email I got today:

"I was about to call you but decided to reply to our previous (old) conversation to help with context. I did in fact end up 'making' my fiancee's engagement ring, however I was looking for a jeweler in the area to help with two issues. One of my close friends, Kevin Tabb recommended you very highly (in addition to my own positive experience in the previous emails). 

Issue #1 is that the ring (platinum) needs to be resized. It's a little too big, despite being told she was a size 5.5

Issue #2 is that I didn't fully set the stone (Maine tourmaline). After I finished drilling the seat, it chipped while the jeweler I was working with was checking the prongs before I closed them. Despite being damaged in the process, I still thought the stone looked good enough to propose with. I didn't want to risk shattering the stone and losing that opportunity, so I ended up tightening it as best I could without feeling uncomfortable and gave my fiancee the option of replacing the tourmaline with a new stone.  She has insisted she wants to keep the original stone as long as possible, so I was wondering if you'd be willing to try and finish setting the stone. 

Would you be willing to try to set the tourmaline and resize the ring? I understand there is a significant risk that the stone could be further damaged and know that you can't guarantee that won't happen. If so, how much would those services cost, and how long would it take?"

 

 So let me review a few things:  You are not a jeweler unless you've had actual training in some form in the field and worked in it, no matter how romantic it might seem.  It took me 40 years to get where I am today and I know what I'm talking about.   I'm not really in business to fix your mistakes when you pretended to be a jeweler so it's going to cost a lot for me to fix all of your mistakes (possibly as much as you paid the other jeweler for the "help"). If you want jewelers like me to be around to fix your mistakes you have to buy the jewelry from me to begin with (of course then you won't have to pay for any mistakes because I won't make them!)  

Again, I appreciate the sentiment, but jewelers who agree to do this with customers demean our profession.  And it's demeaning to all jewelers when a customer thinks that it really doesn't take any training or skills to do what we do.